Twas October the first nineteen twenty and eight,
To a large Irish family came a brother quite great,
Keen and witty, tough but pretty, handsome man among men,
Took to ballin so they'd call him Buckets now and again,
Though Catholic School's often cruel, the seminary he tried,
But for love of the ladies, put these plans by the side,
No it was in the Army his true calling was found,
My old man found the limelight halfway the world round,
Yes, Singing for G.I.'s and ex-nazi girls,
The theatre bug bit him half way round the world,
Now when he came home on to college he went,
From production to production like a madman hell-bent,
But his mind was quite keen on his course and his way,
To be the Goddamn best actor that ever did play,
So bring out your critics and break out cigars,
Come on you cynics and drunken in bars,
The curtain is drawn and the stage is all set,
Now hear of the best man that I've ever met.

So with raving reviews to Kansas City he went,
With a troupe of young actors, but from heaven was sent,
The prettiest girl he had seen in his life,
So by hook or by crook he would make her his wife,
Now he would play Hamlet and Lear of great lore,
And Richard, and Henry, Gloucester and more,
But when in San Francisco at the Black Sheep he sang,
When someone named Christy on their doorbell rang,
Yes, twas there among Beatniks he found his best part,
The dear role of father so close to my heart,
So on to Miami to settle and stay,
Came the Goddamn best actor that ever did play.
So break out the whiskey and sing with great cheer,
His students, and his friends, and his kin are all here.
We all play our parts on the stage where we're set!
His was being the best man that I ever met.

Fine fellow to professor in six minutes flat,
He joined U of M and showed them where it's at,
As he held them all hostage to the trial of the stage,
And called into question the wars that we wage,
Stop the World and then spun it for one hell of a ride,
As he taught his students each how to reach down inside,
"Don't fuck-up!" he would tell burgeoning starlets demure,
As they strove for perfection and tried to stay pure,
And the names flowed, the games flowed, the director empowered,
Students grew and they knew that their geniuses flowered.
For a moment time, on a dime you could stop,
Like a dream, it did seem creativities top,
As pie-eyed by stage side we all shook with fear,
The devastation of creation that made itself clear,
As the elements in his hands wrought on the stage,
Depicting the truth in its beauty and rage,
We all stood and gasped, our hands tightly clasped,
At the power of the words whose meaning we grasped,
Realizing, it hit home, then after a pause,
The rising to feet and the roar of applause.
So sing high the praise of King Buckets the Great,
His Kingdom, his Ringdom, his bless-twisted fate,
Yes you can keep Hollywood and old Broadway,
For we had the best Actors that ever did play!

Now time is no friend of the brave and the bold,
And what poisoned our dear Buckets, he bought and drank cold,
Though he kept on directing clear through Ninety-three,
And won two Carbonell's, I've got at home with me,
And his student went on to greatness in life,
And he continued to care for his kids and his wife.
For he taught us to love, and he taught us to see,
What with blood, sweat, and tears we might be,
He taught us to be true to ourselves most of all,
And to hold on to our innocence lest we should fall,
He made many a Sacrifarce here in our name,
And though we cry now you've left us, we thank God you came.
And now somewhere in Heaven, on a stage in the sky,
He gathers a new audience to make laugh and cry,
And the Cherubim cherish him and blush as they do,
When he says take your places, remember your cue,
For he is the greatest actor that ever did play,
And tis enough of a blessing many of you would say,
But to me who listened to him and on his knee set,
He is the very best man that I ever met.

So sing hey didly hey and hey didly hi,
We miss you, we kiss you, but don't say goodbye,
Sing hey didly hey and hey didly hi,
We'll see you someday on that stage in the sky.

So sing hey didly hey and hey didly hi,
We miss you, we kiss you, but don't say goodbye,
Sing hey didly hey and hey didly hi,
We'll see you someday on that stage in the sky.

We'll see you someday on that stage in the sky…